Change Is In The Air

Spring has sprung and I am back home.

My last night in the bush was a bittersweet one. I felt ready to come home and get going with all my other plans, but at the same time I could quite easily have stayed. The rhythm was good, I was able to push my limits and in many cases gain a new found trust with my body. The work was all consuming in the best possible way. As I lay there on the beautifully plush bed, listening to the hyena clan volley calls to each other, I knew not much would be the same.

Days would start with a 4:30 am alarm stream for myself, out of bed by 5 and in the camera room by 5:30. I would try to be about 10 minutes early so that I could take my time relearning the camera I had for the day and asking any questions I might of had. It gave me the time I needed to pep myself up for the day, before the buzz of activity truly began.

There were eight of us to start off with. Johnny had to head back to the States for the start of University after two weeks. The remaining 7 of us: Oliver, Diya, Terry, Gordon, Jessie, Barbara and myself soldiered on under the ever watchful gaze of our mentors. We were so lucky to gel as a group. It happened relatively quickly, irrespective of our different ages and backgrounds. We all wanted to succeed, but we wanted each other to succeed. It was a fantastic environment to be in.

Our mentors David and Nick were incredible. Beyond having a wealth of knowledge and experience in their fields, they are just incredible human beings. The patience, guidance and encouragement they gave was so needed. It made each day a little less daunting. A new addition to the team for this course was the formidable intern Hope. He kept us all laughing while he shot behind the scene footage, which he cut and put together for social media. We all added a bit to the bts footage, but most of it was Hope. The best to see was when Hope had the chance to shoot with one of the cameras: looking forward to seeing what he puts together with those clips.

The course is tough, but necessarily so. The subject matter is diverse and your reaction times need to be good. There is no second take, if you missed it, it’s gone. I had one of those experiences. To be fair there were a few of them. One stands out above the rest. It was my first morning on the Sony FX6, with a 60-600 lens. A beautiful setup. I was pretty confident in myself that I had done all the checks. I had not. We rolled up to a static leopard sighting, and while I was struggling to get everything going the male leopard picked up his kill and headed up the tree. In all the commotion of hearing that it was the beautiful female cub Rhulani I fumbled and fumbled hard. I called out to Nick who jumped into action to help and save the day. He did an amazing job, lying on his side to try and avoid excessive movement, change settings, find the right light and follow the leopard all at the same time.

The saddest part is I was the only one equipped at that point to shoot the scene. It was a hard lesson to learn and I learnt it a few times in various ways. There was no harsh judgement from the mentors, just an urge to learn from the mistake and try and not let it happen again. It was a refreshing thing for me. The gents also made sure to curb any excessive harsh self criticism when they heard it. They would often ask what we would do different if we had another shot, making us think and work through it.

Depending on which camera we had for the day would depend on whether we were on Bonnie or Clyde. Bonnie was captained by Lauren, who kept us on our toes with much needed suggestions, gentle nudges, action that was happening in our periphery and for those on the mighty Raptor - prerecord reminders. There were a lot of interesting chats that were had, especially the one on ethics which was expanded on in a lecture. There is so much that goes into this field that there were some nights were I had to decompress a little. I feel like I am still doing that. There was so much to absorb. Slowly I will keep writing out my experience and the technical things I do not want to forget.

Clerence was the guide on Clyde when there weren’t guests staying at the lodge, otherwise David would take over. There were a lot of different chats had on Clyde, depending on where you sat and what was going on. It was brilliant listening to where everyone agreed and disagreed. One of our quietest days we had I was on Clyde. Clerence missioned in tracking the lions, but they weren’t playing ball. We spent a bit of time talking about how this is actually incredibly normal and something that everyone needs to get used to. Sometimes the slower days help to rejuvenate before heading back out.

There will be no surprise here for my regular readers: I loved the days where I could absorb the changing landscape, the many different trees, the wild flowers that had dried and those that were starting to bud. What would grow more prolifically in one area and what would grow in another. The cold air that would mingle with the hot air before one could see the drainage line and then the gentle push of warm air as we left the area. All of these things and more made me as happy as seeing the animals and learning more about them.

The only good part about drive ending, regardless of what time of the day, was to tuck into the delicious food by Chef Karabo and Chef Dimpho after receiving the warmest greeting from Nnana; who is loved by everyone on the course. She knew us all by name and got to know us all one by one. It was a beautiful thing to witness and to experience.

I am always exceptionally nervous going to any new place as to whether I will be able to eat anything. Chef Karabo was eager to chat to me when I arrived so that he could understand everything. We shared ideas and checked in with each other, which was fantastic. Up until meeting Chef Karabo I have never had consistently incredible and safe food when traveling. It was such a wonderful thing to never go without or make a plan by picking out what I could eat. There was always something delicious for me. Chef Karabo, Chef Dimpho and Nnana spent some creative hours in the kitchen figuring out some delicious desserts for me as well. My first ever chocolate mousse (divine!) and malva pudding, which is a South African staple I have never had. To be included in this way was so special to me.

I had four people in the know who were checking in with me during the day. Their check in’s where often silent, but I knew I had all of their support and at any stage I could come to them if my body threw me a curve ball. Nnana and I developed a quick short hand which helped her help me if I needed it. Lauren and the gents were good with accepting me having to take drives off (albeit a little sad) and the extra encouragement when I did join back was so wonderful. It made the mental battle of carrying on that much easier.

My classmates knew that I had health issues, and I am not sure how much they picked up on, but I never explained anything in full. I didn’t want my chronic illness to be the leader of everything. I wanted to be treated as normally as possible. It was something Lauren and I spoke about on our initial call. It was wonderful to have the experience of being just like everyone else. I had to make it work, like anyone else had to. It was healing for me. I am so grateful for the support I received whether people knew or not. The collaborative environment was an incredible support system. It is something I am truly going to miss settling back into my business of one.

In that initial call Lauren was adamant that I would complete the course. Graduation night was so special to me. For three reasons. It happened to be my Opa’s birthday; tomorrow it will be a year since he has been gone. I met Lauren’s prediction. And best of all I didn’t disappoint myself. I did it! I managed through some not so fun curve balls from my body to build a show reel that was loved by all. Including myself. It is quite a thing to be at a stage where I love my work.

I have also opened a new door for myself, with the support of everyone around me and I am both nervous and exhilarated. I spent the month learning to thank people for their compliments, however I found myself so overwhelmed by them all. I am so incredibly grateful for the experience and the growth that has come out of it. I’m sure it is not surprising to anyone that the word I chose at the beginning of the course was: Growth.

I have realised during writing this all that I am not going to encapsulate all I want to say in just one article. There will definitely be more to come. On Wednesday I will be uploading my show reel so that you are all able to see what I was able to achieve. I have also considered a possible sneaky YouTube channel that may appear in the next couple of weeks. Let’s see what happens.

Happy Spring Day to all my Southern Hemisphere readers. May the blooms and scents of Spring revitalise you for the rest of the year.

Stay well and keep growing x

* Disclaimer: This is not an ad for Too Wild or Amaya, it is just my experience.